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Let’s face it – it’s a wedding and mishaps are bound to occur. But you can always take the proactive approach, think ahead, and minimize the risks. Here’s how:
Discuss money matters beforehand.
Money matters should be discussed discretely, and before the actual event, both with your own family and your in-laws, including your future spouse. Have the important discussions one-on one, and make sure everyone is on the same page, so that when you do meet, it is not embarrassing or awkward.
Don’t play the “lone ranger”.
Arranging a wedding is no small feat. It requires a lot of coordination and help. You can’t do it alone. Play to the strengths of family and friends and divvy up the work. This helps to take the weight off of your shoulders and also makes everyone feel involved.
Don’t compromise comfort for style.
Whether it be the wedding dress or shoes, looking good is important, but not more than feeling good. You will be in the dress/suit, and shoes for a while, and if you are not comfortable it will show – on your face and in the photographs. Go with shoes that are comfortable rather heels that will leave your feet sore for days.
Delegate, delegate, delegate!
Assign tasks to different people so that one person isn’t overwhelmed with making all the decisions. An example is a person each for the decor, catering, music, guest greeting, usher etc. This gets more people feeling involved and more jobs getting done smoothly.
Have a flexible seating plan.
With desi weddings it is difficult even with RSVPs to know how many guests will ultimately show up. Have a 10-15% margin for the catering and for the venue to have the flexibility to add tables to avoid any last minute seating problems.
Not everyone has to speak.
Your friends and family love you and they are there for you on your big day, having stood by you through countless memorable times. It’s nice to let key family and friends share memories, but don’t make it an open mic. Even the best of friends and family can bring the energy down and make you want to shrivel into the cocoon.
Stress on punctuality.
There is nothing more annoying than arriving on time to a wedding reception or waleema functions and seeing that the hosts, bride, groom are running late. If you expect your guests to be on time, you as host have to set a good example. Also, keeping in mind that the hall or marquee reservation time and the wedding curfews in Punjab and thereabouts, you need to make sure that your event start on time so that it can end without any hassle on time.
Arrange the food lines.
Desi weddings are a big mismanaged when it comes to serving dinner. In a large wedding, there is nothing worse than when finally, it is time to eat, everyone is told “dinner is available.” Guests get stuck in long buffet lines, and the people at the end of the line usually miss out on the good stuff – barbecue, etc. The catch is to announce to one table at a time, so as not to create a rush at the buffet table and make sure everyone gets a taste of all the dishes.
Have at least one wedding rehearsal.
At desi weddings, rehearsals are an unheard-of concept. Many bizarre entrance and exit snafus can be avoided with a bit of pre-event planning and coordination. The main entrance for the bride and groom and the rukhsati need to be well-planned in order to avoid any last minute confusions. It is also best to have your photographer and videographer at the rehearsal to ensure they are aware of how everything will take place so that they can capture all the important moments on the big day.
Make sure to acknowledge all your guests.
It is human nature that we like to be acknowledged. For hosts it is important that as guests walk in they are greeted. Once the reception is in full play it is a nice gesture if the parents of the bride and groom walk around the tables and thank the guests. Similarly, there is a lot of work the bride and or grooms’ family puts into the planning of the wedding – so, as a guest, acknowledge the effort of the hosts and compliment them on a wedding well-organized.
