How Do You Determine the Health of Your Marriage?

“It’s no good pretending that any relationship has a future if your record collections disagree violently or if your favorite films wouldn’t even speak to each other if they met at a party.” – Nick Hornby

Relationships they can be a real challenge. Today it seems that relationships are disposable, even marriage relationships seem to be tossed aside for something that may appear to be a better relationship. But there might be ways to avoid that by gauging the health of your relationship.

Have you ever thought that it would help to determine how good or healthy your marriage is? This isn’t an exact science with objective calculations and statistics. So, how do people know if their marriage is healthy or not? Simple – the look at the things that matter.

Here are a few of those things that can help determine the health of your marriage:

  • You’re Decision are Joint Decisions: Neither one of you is calling all the shots. From what movie to see to how many children to have, you make decisions together and listen to each other’s concerns and desires.
  • You Practice Freedom of Speech: Relationships, especially marriages, thrive when couples can express themselves freely and honestly. That means no topic is off-limits, and you both feel heard.
  • You both have Personal Space: Just because you’re married doesn’t mean you have to spend every moment together. Taking time to pursue your own interests and friendships keeps your relationship fresh and gives you both the opportunity to grow as individuals while also growing as a couple.
  • You like Your Spouse – And Yourself: Chances are your relationship won’t suddenly get better if you win the lottery, have a baby, or move into your dream house. So don’t base your marriage on the hope that it will change. You accept and value each other for who you are right now—not who you might become.
  • You Disagree and Fight Sometimes: Disagreements are normal, so if you aren’t fighting, chances are you’re holding back. Healthy relationships involve couples fight productively and fairly. That means avoiding name-calling or put-downs. And when you’re wrong? You apologize.
  • Your Marriage Is Your Sanctuary: Your marriage should be a safety net—a stable place to come home to at the end of the day. And when things are hard, you’d rather see your spouse than commiserate with co-workers at Happy Hour.

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